A Guide to the 100 Star Rating

0-10 Stars—Inedible, Un-useable, unwatchable, or rage-inducing.

11-20 Stars—All of the above…but also makes you think, “Do I want to eat another one/see it again?” or “Do I now feel better after crying/screaming/throwing things?”

21-45 Stars—Causes much annoyance, but the knowledge of the experience might come in handy in the future.

46-60 Stars—The zoo is probably more interesting. But if the zoo is closed…

61-70 Stars—I’m definitely going to tell my friends about this, leaving out the part where I ______.

71-80 Stars—Why doesn’t anyone else realize how cool this is?

81-90 Stars—I love it so much I want to take it out behind the school and impregnate it.

91-100 Stars—Without this, life is stale and useless. I have finally found meaning.